They probably have kids together and that is the only bond they share.
The ideal woman for this guy is the girl who has been hurt many times by single men and is in the stage where she just wants someone to love her.
He cancels plans, he goes MIA for days at a time, he acts distant.
At the root of it, the same sense of insecurity that made the guy obsessed with finding out if you like him is now scaring him into thinking that you’re going to “take his freedom away.” Generally speaking, most guys have a fear of being “trapped” in a relationship, but in this particular scenario you’re dealing with a guy who’s actions are especially dictated by avoiding unpleasant situations as a primary motivator.
After they meet and exchange conversation, he realizes what he has been missing at home and decides to pursue his happiness with her on the side.
However, filling the void may backfire on him, as the relationship may escalate from occasional lunches during work hours or early dinners disguised as “working late”, to the more intimate texting and instant messages all night long.
In fact, he’d probably currently look at living together as something that would trap him and confine him. nobody truly ever knows what the future holds for them or their relationship. (By “getting it” I mean the partner not participating in the fantasy that the other one has in his/her mind for the relationship.) Don’t get caught up in fantasy land.
At this point, things are probably starting to get comfortable- you make plans regularly, you’re in contact more frequently, and a relationship seems just around the corner.Now while you might start getting really excited by this prospect, this particular guy has probably gotten freaked out.